Before using douche and enema :: try to clear up what aim you and your partner pursue. There are three main types of this procedure. During the first type, douche and enema are rather imitated than given. Water is not used and everything comes to nothing more than inserting into rectum. Such variant may be a starting point in your medical games, if your partner is not ready for full experiment with douche and enema. Right after the procedure, you can make sex without wasting time on water jetting. The second type represents injection of limited water volume (200-250ml). There are some advantages of this method. Your partner won't feel overpressure in bowels and you are safe against troubles which may be caused. If douche and enema are used often during your erotic games, full procedure may have baneful influence on gut organisms. During the third method, full procedure with douche and enema is held.
For lovemaking :: Clitoral pumps and teasers are perfect for foreplay thus turning the woman on and preparing her for the intercourse. The sex toy can be used during coitus for achieving double pleasure.
Gentleness, adequate lubrication :: and anal relaxation are required for anal sex! If condoms are used for penile penetration, which is advisable to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted disease, it is important to use water based anal lubricant. The man should control his thrusting, so as to give the partner time to allow their sphincter to relax. This will become easier with time and practice. Some anal lubricants contain a desensitizer to make the anal play more comfortable. Since the anal region is not self lubricating, anal lubricants are very helpful for making anal penetration more comfortable and more pleasurable. Anal sex should not hurt. If it hurts, somebody does it wrong. With enough lubricant and enough patience, it's possible to enjoy anal sex. However, some people may never like it. If your lover is one of those people, respect their views. Don't force the idea upon them!